Sunday, October 25, 2009

cheap nights, loud music, couches, and double standards.

I've been doing really well in the drinking department. I have been very hospitable to my liver these days. I've only been getting a little sloppy drunk on the weekends as opposed to pass out drunk every night. I went to a couple parties every night of the weekend and only drank a few beers. I was tempted to drink more, but I knew that by drinking more I'll fall back into the rut of early alcoholism. Yeah, I kinda had a serious drinking problem for awhile. Did you know that? idk if i already mentioned it. The only problem is that I've replaced drinking with smoking green. Omg. I love marijuana. Even the smell gets me off these days.I love the bubbling sound of a bong. I smoke a gram about every couple a days. And I firmly believe bongs are one of the greatest inventions of all time. idk. i guess smoking weed is bad for you, but in my defense it's a hell of a lot better for your body than cigs and booze. Plus, I just love the way everyone opens up when they're high. It's like marijuana washes away everyone's fears and insecurities. We have the best talks high.
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I hate double standards. I smoke a lot of cigs and I get judged all the time for it by male smokers. Last night while smoking outside with a bunch of guys, they told me between taking drags that  I was too pretty to smoke cigs. wtf. Why can guys do everything they want and get away with it. This includes casual sex. My ex friend J-rod called me a whore the other day for sleeping around. Even though he does it all the time. He said, "it's just different with girls." UGH. I just wanted to scream at him. But instead I just ignored him and will continue ignoring his calls and texts for the rest of my life. don't call me a whore for sleeping around. I am a 19 year old, healthy independent, young, sexual being. I sleep around responsibly for the fun of it. I don't do it out of emotional angst or anything. These are my choices about my own body. I am not destructive. I praise my body and satisfy it in many ways. I love my life. Besides, I shouldn't have to explain myself to anyone whose buisness it doesn't belong to. Yeah?
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I finally found a decent house to live in over the summer. I'm so excited. It's two levels and very pretty. It's an old one with wooden floors, glass window panes, and a huge front porch. The bed rooms are a decent size and the girls who need the roommate are really nice. The distance from campus isn't that bad either. Just a comfortable bike ride.

3 comments:

  1. Double standards are shitty, and they are everywhere and unavoidable. There's a book I just read called "He's a stud, she's a slut and 49 other double standards every woman should know." Men can do anything and not only get away with it, but be praised for it. Women have to be clean, pretty, quiet and well behaved. Fuck that!

    Also, some of the best conversations were had with my friends when we were high. It lets you let go of your inhibitions. It should be mandatory to smoke pot in therapy.

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  2. weed<333 cigs<33 alcohol<333

    I hate double standards.

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  3. i want to judge you and say what you're doing is wrong, but what is wrong? what's the norm? you're just doing things i wouldn't. there's nothing wrong with that.

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